Rules To Live By.
“You will end up wherever is acceptable to you. Certain things to me are very important, where I will not settle for second best, and there are a lot of other things I just don't care about. So in decisionmaking,, I have a few heuristics for myself. Mine are, if you can't decide, the answer is no. Secondly, if you have two decisions and both seem like they’re very equal, take the path that is more painful in the short term. And then finally, is that you want to take the choice that will leave you more equanimous in the long term. By equanimous, that means more at peace, more mental peace in the long term, and I will focus on decision making down on the three things that really matter.” -Naval Ravikant.
I remember when I introduced Naval to my brothers, after reading his book, The Almanack of Naval Ravikant: A Guide to Wealth and Happiness, they were so impressed that they said it was a life manual that they needed to revisit every once in a while, to guide them in navigating life. I’m not sure if they have gotten around to rereading after that; we know how life goes.
I’m doing a bit of reset, so I naturally gravitated towards Naval’s words. I’m sharing some of my favourites with you, for my brothers as a refresher if they haven’t gotten around to reading the book again and for anyone that hasn’t been introduced to Naval.
One day, I realised that with all these people I was jealous of, I couldn’t just choose little aspects of their life. I couldn’t say “I want his body”, “I want her money”, “I want his personality”. You have to be that person. Do you actually want to be that person, with all of their reactions, desires, their family, their happiness level, their outlook on life, their self-image? If you’re not willing to do a wholesale, 24/7, 100% swap with who that person is, then there is no point in being jealous.
You have two lives, and the second one begins when you realize you only have one
Every second you have on this planet is very precious, and it’s your responsibility to make sure you’re happy and interpreting everything in the best possible way.
The problem is that to win at a status game, you have to put somebody else down. That’s why you should avoid status games in your life because they make you into an angry, combative person. You’re always fighting to put other people down, to put yourself and the people you like up.
“A fit body, a calm mind, a house full of love. These things cannot be bought — they must be earned.”
“Information is everywhere, but its meaning is created by the observer that interprets it. Meaning is relative and there is no objective, over-arching meaning.”
“Sophisticated foods are bittersweet (wine, beer, coffee, chocolate). Addictive relationships are cooperative and competitive. Work becomes flow at the limits of ability. The flavour of life is on the edge.”
“The fundamental delusion — there is something out there that will make me happy and fulfilled forever.”
“Success is the enemy of learning. It can deprive you of the time and the incentive to start over. Beginner’s mind also needs beginner’s time.”
“All the benefits in life come from compound interest — money, relationships, habits — anything of importance.”
“A contrarian isn’t one who always objects — that’s a confirmist of a different sort. A contrarian reasons independently, from the ground up, and resists pressure to conform.”
“Before you can lie to another, you must first lie to yourself.”
“You make your own luck if you stay at it long enough.”
“We’re not really here for that long, and we don’t really matter that much. And nothing that we do lasts. So eventually, you will fade. Your works will fade. Your children will fade. Your thoughts will fade. This planet will fade. The sun will fade. It will all be gone.”
“A rational person can find peace by cultivating indifference to things outside of their control.”
“The first rule of handling conflict is don’t hang around people who are constantly engaging in conflict.”
“People spend too much time doing and not enough time thinking about what they should be doing.”
“Be present above all else.”
“If you can’t see yourself working with someone for life, don’t work with them for a day.”
“Humans are basically habit machines… I think learning how to break habits is actually a very important meta skill and can serve you in life almost better than anything else.”
“The older the problem, the older the solution.”
“It’s the mark of a charlatan to try and explain simple things in complex ways and it’s the mark of a genius to explain complicated things in simple ways.”
“Clear thinkers appeal to their own authority.”
“If you’re desensitized to the fact that you’re going to die, consider it a different way. As far as you’re concerned, this world is going to end. Now what?”
“Following your genuine intellectual curiosity is a better foundation for a career than following whatever is making money right now.”
“A personal metric: how much of the day is spent doing things out of obligation rather than out of interest.
“To be honest, speak without identity.”
“People who live far below their means enjoy a freedom that people busy upgrading their lifestyles can’t fathom.”
“We feel guilt when we no longer want to associate with old friends and colleagues who haven’t changed. The price, and marker, of growth.”
“Watch every thought. Always ask, why am I having this thought?”
“All greatness comes from suffering.”
“Love is given, not received.”
“Every moment has to be complete in and of itself.”
“So I have no time for short-term things: dinners with people I won’t see again, tedious ceremonies to please tedious people, traveling to places that I wouldn’t go to on vacation.”
“I don’t have time is just saying it’s not a priority.”
“Happiness is a state where nothing is missing.”
“Someone who is using a lot of fancy words and big concepts probably doesn’t know what they’re talking about. The smartest people can explain things to a child; if you can’t do that, you don’t understand the concept.”
“Escape competition through authenticity.”
“School, politics, sports, and games train us to compete against others. True rewards — wealth, knowledge, love, fitness, and equanimity — come from ignoring others and improving ourselves.”
“Reality is neutral. Our reactions reflect back and create our world. Judge, and feel separate and lonely. Angry and lose peace of mind. Cling, and live in anxiety. Fantasise, and miss the present. Desire, and suffer until you have it. Heaven and hell are right here, right now.”
“Knowledge is a skyscraper. You can take a shortcut with a fragile foundation of memorization, or build slowly upon a steel frame of understanding.”
“Doctors won’t make you healthy. Nutritionists won’t make you slim. Teachers won’t make you smart. Gurus won’t make you calm. Mentors won’t make you rich. Trainers won’t make you fit. Ultimately, you have to take responsibility. Save yourself.”
“You have to surrender, at least a little bit, to be the best version of yourself possible.”
In any situation in life, you only have three options. You always have three options. You can change it, you can accept it, or you can leave it. What is not a good option is to sit around wishing you would change it but not changing it, wishing you would leave it but not leaving it, and not accepting it. It's that struggle, that aversion, that is responsible for most of our misery. The phrase that I probably use the most to myself in my head is just one word: accept.
Specialisation is for insects. I don't believe in this model of trying to focus your life on one thing. You've got one life, just do everything you want.
You can download a free version of the book here.
Keep going,
Ije
Wow!!! Golden nuggets!! I totally agree with all of them! I just ordered a copy of the book. Thanks for the recommendation
Indeed! Indeed!!
Oh, I’m so glad you bought the books. It’s a treasure.