Propagation.

Birmingham Museums Trust

We propagate our ideas, lessons, vision, even legacy through people, but how do you get your people to accept your what you are “selling”.

Whether it’s a founder trying to get people(potential hires, investors, team or customers) to buy into his vision. A parent passing down values to their children etc. We all need people in one way or another. Life was designed as a team sport.

But what happens when people seem like they are deaf to you no matter what you do. Like taking a donkey to the stream but it refuses to drink.

I have been thinking about influence a lot and being hyper aware of the fact that a lot of the things I need done depends on the quality of people that I surround myself with and my ability to get people to transmit my what is in my head, make it theirs wholeheartedly. Knowing full well that rewards, pressure, persuasion — even guilt only gets us for far.

How do I create the conditions and environment for people to move themselves?

I was listening to an episode of Leila Hormozi and she spoke about self determination theory as a way to drive results with people.

Self-Determination Theory (SDT) was developed by psychologists Edward Deci and Richard Ryan, as evidence-based framework for understanding human motivation. It says that people are most motivated, engaged, resilient and willing when three basic psychological needs are met:

1. Autonomy – the need to feel like we are choosing our path.

2. Competence – the need to feel capable and effective

3. Relatedness – the need to feel connected, seen, and valued

To influence people, which is what we are trying to do every time we want to get someone to understand our point of view (work, home, play, everywhere) authentically, people need to feel like the decision was theirs, they need to believe they can succeed and not being set up for failure, they need to feel safe, seen and supported.

Autonomy looks something like this;

“What approach feels right to you?”

“Here are the options — how would you like to move forward?”

Competence;

“Let’s start small. What support do you need to feel confident?”

“Want to break this down together so it feels more doable?”

Relatedness;

“I get it. That sounds tough — how can I support you through it?”

“I care about how this affects you.”

“Let’s work on this together.”

Influence is not about making people do something. It’s about creating a space where they want to do it, choose to do it, and believe they can do it.

I know there is no silver bullet when it comes to human as we are quite complex but it doesn’t hurt to try. I sure will be because there is so much I need to get done that I couldn’t even begin to make a dent with people that can take the vision and “run” with it, both literally and figuratively.

Keep going,

Ije.